How often do we minimalize ourselves for the sake of those around us? We have this constant nagging voice in our heads that remind us not to be boastful, arrogant, or conceded. But when does that start impacting our confidence and our ability to take pride in our lives, our achievements, and our work?
We live in a society where it is one extreme or another. We are either self-conscience or we are arrogant. Is it possible to find the middle ground? Yes. Yes it is. It is when we decide that we don’t care about the thoughts of the strangers around us and we air our good deeds like the laundry they are. Good laundry. We present our achievements as a motivation to those around us. We take pride in our work to our friends and families so they can also be proud of us and who we have become.
Don’t minimalize yourself. Stop focusing on the bad and start focusing on the positive things you have done in your life. Change the “I should have’s” to “This is what I have done so far.” We are setting limits for ourselves and we need to stop. Every time we think about where we were going or where we should be instead of where we have gone and where we are actually headed, we become our own obstacle in our lives.
Stop the bullshit and the repetitive cycle. Claw yourself out of it, stand up, and make yourself known. Be proud of who you are, what you have, and the work you are putting in to improve yourself. Improve yourself, don’t change yourself. You are amazing. Be who you were meant to be.
Now, I’m not saying that you need to talk just to hear yourself. Don’t spill your life story to every stranger you meet on the bus or in the bar. The truth? Most people won’t give a shit. Everyone is to a degree, consumed with themselves. But when someone asks you what you do for a living? Be confident. When you achieve something that you set your heart out to get, call up your friend, your mom, your dad, your sister, your brother, your neighbor and be happy about it. Let someone else participate in your excitement.
I’m an offender just as the rest of us. I down play everything that I’ve done in my life because I thought I would be further along by now. Because I don’t want to sound like I’m bragging. Oh yea, I own a house. It isn’t anything fancy. NO! I bought my own house. A nice house. I took a long time picking it out and making sure it was what I wanted. My career? Oh, I just work for a Technical Support company. It’s okay. NO! I’ve worked there for seven years and have worked my ass off every day that I’ve been there. I didn’t even think I would survive the first week and didn’t even own a laptop when I started. I’ve made my way up from the ground level and I’m still building working relationships that matter. Oh, I just do a blog for fun. I’m not any good. NO! Okay, well sort of. I do this blog for fun but you know what? I’m passionate about it. I put myself out there to be argued with, criticized, disagreed with, and I have the courage to do it. I’ve taken my journal and made it public to hold myself accountable to my own thoughts and feelings. I don’t care if one person reads it or a thousand. I did it for myself and I’ve stuck with it. I could go on but you get the gist. Take credit for the things in your life that you have worked hard for and forgive yourself for the things you “think you should have had by now.” Cut yourself some slack.
Stop minimalizing yourself. Love yourself. Be proud of yourself. Show others that it is okay to be proud of who they are. Be an encouraging example of how life hasn’t run you over and that they have the strength to achieve the things out of life that they want. Be the person that your child, niece, nephew, neighbor, teenager looks up to. If you down-play yourself, you are teaching other people how to treat you and perceive you. Change their perception. Be the fucking person that makes the ground tremble before you when you walk. Embrace your strengths and you will simultaneously improve your weaknesses.
When you get up in the morning, make sure the world knows it. Make sure that you feel who you are down to the very core of your being and everyone else won’t be able to ignore it. Make life worth living.
Tammy Lee
November 26, 2018
Unrefined Life Adventures 